#MarriageChronicles 09: Tests X Conditions


Hellurr…did you miss marriage chronicles last week? I did! If you haven’t read earlier articles here, here and here, you definitely should. Today I’m intrigued by the tests we carry out before we say ‘yes’. Really I am. But before we chew on the meat of the matter, I’d love to set the mood…Queen B with Hello..

I had an interesting conversation with a group of friends last week and believe me I wish y’all were with me. One of us was sharing on one of the tests she must carry out on a man before she agrees to date him. Sperm count! Yes you read right. After all the laugh and tease we were actually awed to see that she was dead serious. I mean she had taken the sperm, and urine samples from this guy already and now she’s sure he’s healthy (high sperm count *wink*), she’s ready to say yes to him.

Oh you don’t want to imagine how much we laughed and gasped at the same time! I was majorly filled with respect for the young lady who knew what she wanted and wasn’t fazed about getting it. I took a lot of lessons home! While I doubt I’ll do a sperm count test on a man before I agree to date him, I just may do before marriage.

Another shared on the genotype test and how she must not date a man who’s AS because she of same genotype. More tests! She has turned down amazing prospects because of this issue. I would always say, to each his own, because I believe we are formed by the very thing we believe. I grew up never thinking that the genotype test was enough to kill a positively thriving relationship but then people have lots of varying beliefs and realities.

My question now though is, how much tests should one carry out before they say yes? Male and female alike. And how much positives or negatives are enough to make or mar a relationship? I believe the most important tests should be the non-physical. Things like his faith, his character, his purpose. Those are the things I test for and if they don’t resonate with me, we say the grace and move on. No I’m not saying the physicals aren’t important, they are. But a lot of things, if not all things are controlled by the spiritual and I think giving more time to tests on the physical is short-changing oneself. Hmm…what do I know, I’ve never been married.

But what are your thoughts though? What tests do/did you carry out on your spouse that gives/gave you assurance that he/she is possibly the one? You know how eager I am to read from you. Please drop a comment below and let’s get talking!! Don’t forget to share this with friends and foe too.

*hugs and kisses*
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6 Discussion to this post

  1. Gracey says:

    Lol @sperm count.

    As for genotype, I think it’s rather important. I lost my bestfriend few years ago. He was SS and I watched him deal with pain after pain after pain. Im sure his parents were blindly in love and werent thinking about the future .


  2. Ursula says:

    Hey Gracie…great to read from you…Sorry about your friend. May his soul rest peacefully. But these days measures are being employed to avoid that. Pre-implantation genetics diagnosis for instance. Sometimes we need some extra knowledge. It’s well…

  3. Tobi says:

    Sperm count though ? While, I agree that the non-physical tests are definitely more important, the physcial ones are as well. I’m with Gracey on genotype testing. I’ve read a bit about PIGD and the way I see it, the jury is still out on that esp since you only get that with IVF. Anyway, I wouldn’t really have to test that since I’m AA but a genotype test won’t hurt anyone na. To each his own, though. Having said that, the only physical thing I think of that’ll mar my relationships is a terminal illness.


  4. Corazon Amukhale says:

    Relationships in this century are very tricky… Personally His relationship with God is very important to me. How strong is his heart and finally I Must love his EYES (HAHAHA) Yeah those eyes must attract me to him. Nice article

    • Ursula says:

      Hahaha…feels like I read a comment I wrote. I love eyes too like oh my gosh!!!! And his relationship with God must be something I can gladly write a full blog post about. Not this religion fanatics everywhere…thanks Corazon! Lovely name too..*hugs*

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